AN OPEN LOVE LETTER TO SQUIRRELS
SUBMITTED BY AN ANONYMOUS DOG
Dear Squirrels,
Today is Squirrel Appreciation Day (as I’m sure you already know) so I would like to let you know some of the reasons I love Squirrels. Especially those of you who chitter and chatter at me.
I wish you would come down from the tree.
My human gets mad when I chase you.
She says, “leave it” and I’m just supposed to sit there while you flick your fluffy tail.
TAUNTING ME!!!!
If I leave it, I get a treat (the only thing I love more than squirrels).
So, I leave it.
If it’s so wrong to chase you,
why is my brain wired to chase you?!?
How am I supposed to resist a flighty little dash of fur disappearing behind a tree?
WHERE DID IT GO? WHERE???
What was I saying? Oh yes.
I love the way you scamper around looking for nuts and seeds. Sometimes you bury them for safekeeping but later forget where they are. Can’t you smell them? Is your nose broken? Or are you trying to plant more trees?
Trees = sticks, so fine by me.
Sometimes my human gives me toys that kind of look like you… But it’s not the same.
By the way, if you happened to witness what I did to those squirrel toys... I had to get the squeaker out. It was my quest. So don't worry, I won't do that to you.
Unless... do you have a squeaker?
Oh and when two of you chase each other, I GET!! SO! EXCITED!!! ! !
Please tell me.
Why do you always sit where I can't reach,
staring, chittering, FLICKING YOUR TAIL AT ME?
Don’t you want to play?!
I promise I won’t bite.*
*I will try my very best.
I think I can speak for all dogs when I say, life just wouldn’t be the same without Squirrels.
Love,
Anonymous Dog